Well, I had an old hen and she had a wooden leg
Just the best old hen that ever laid and egg
She laid more eggs than any hen on the farm
But another little drink wouldn't do her any harm

Turkey in the hay, in the hay, hay, hay!
Turkey in the straw, in the straw, straw, straw!
Pick 'em up, shake 'em up, any way at all
And hit up a tune called 'Turkey in the Straw'

Well, I hitched up the wagon and I drove down the road
With a two horse wagon and a four horse load
Well I cracked my whip and the lead horse sprung
And I said "Goodbye" to the wagon tongue

Well, if frogs had wings and snakes had hair
And automobiles went flyin' thro' the air
Well, if watermelons grew on a huckleberry vine
We'd still have winter in the summer time

Oh, I went out to milk and I didn't know how
I milked an old goat instead of a cow
A monkey sittin' there on a pile of straw
A-winkin' his eyes at his mother-in-law

Well, I come to the river and I couldn't get across
So I paid five dollars for an old blind horse
Well, he wouldn't go ahead and he wouldn't stand still
So he went up and down like an old saw mill