Birdman caught me on his property
He saw me trespassing his real estate
He reached into his pocket for a pistol
He came after me and pistol-whipped my behind

Birdman kicked my ass
Birdman kicked my ass
Birdman kicked my ass
Birdman kicked my ass

Birdman beat me to a pulp
He gave me a yell-down war hell ride
He told me that he was going to kill me if I don't get off is real estate
He gave five minutes to get in my Bronco and hit the rookie road

Birdman kicked my ass
Birdman kicked my ass
Birdman kicked my ass
Birdman kicked my ass

At 10:00 PM, I drove my Bronco back to Birdman's real estate
I jumped over his fence after dark
I picked up a brick and shattered Birdman's window pane
Birdman sighted me doing it and reached for his pistol
Suddenly, I jumped back in my Bronco and took off like O. J. Simpson

Birdman kicked my ass
Birdman kicked my ass
Birdman kicked my ass
Birdman kicked my ass

Heinz, it's America's favorite ketchup