My maid is cleaning my bathroom, so I can't take a shower
When I do, the water starts getting cold after an hour
I couldn't order off the breakfast menu, cause I slept in till two
Then I filled up on bread, didn't leave any room for tiramisu
Oh, no, there's a pixel out in the corner of my laptop screen

I don't have any bills in my wallet small enough for the vending machine
Some idiot just called me up on the phone, what!?
Don't they know how to text? Omg!
I got

First world, first world problems
(First world problems)
First world, first world problems
(First world problems)
First world, first world problems

I bought too many groceries for my refrigerator
Forgot my gardener's name, I'll have to ask him later
Tried to fast forward commercials, can't, I'm watching live tv
I'm pretty sure the cookies in this airport lounge ain't gluten free
My barista didn't even bother to make a design in the foam on the top of my vanilla latte

First world, first world problems
(First world problems)
First world, first world problems
(First world problems)
First world, first world problems

Can't remember which car I drove to the mall
My sonicare won't recharge, now I gotta brush my teeth like a neanderathal

The thread count on these cotton sheets has got me itching
My house is so big, I can't get wi-fi in the kitchen
Uh, I had to buy something I didn't even need
Just so I could qualify for free shipping on amazon

First world, first world problems
(First world problems)
First world, first world problems
(First world problems)
First world, first world problems

First world, first world problems
(First world problems)
First world, first world problems
(First world problems)
First world, first world problems

(Laughing)