In the dark
waiting with loathing
and dread
she is coming
alerted by my self-pity
she is a child
frozen in her pain
I can never be free of her
and never she of me
sometimes she comes
when I'm trying to know love
she torments me
and tells me
I am not worthy
she is almost here
I can't bear to be
used by her to take revenge
on all who come too near
for fear that they might
make me whole
and her fade away

In my youth
she and I were one
through ridicule and hate
I was torn from myself

She is here

Childhood's wretched slave
can never be led to freedom

Is hatred's hungry child
asleep within all our reason?