Uncle Bill and auntie Mary
Always used to shout
And uncle Bill would knock
Auntie Mary about
With auntie Mary
In such misery
I always thought that cancer
Was like the cavalry

When cancer cut Bill down
They said what a crying shame
Well I never thought so
And Mary did the same
Let's face it Bill
You were a bastard through and through
So when that cancer cut him down
I did not feel blue

Cancer cancer it's so good for you
Cancer cancer it's so good for you
Cancer it will set you free
The big C was like the cavalry

When he was on his deathbed
One day for a joke
Me and auntie Mary
Fun at him we poked
As he lay there
In his abject pain
Me and auntie Mary
We sung him this refrain

Cancer cancer it's so good for you ...

When he died
Later that same day
Me and auntie Mary
For him didn't pray
But sometimes on a winter's night
Though he has been long gone
Me and auntie Mary
Still sing the same song

Cancer cancer it's so good for you ...