I might lost my leg in the war
But war, it was love
My girl's a real shark
I'm not gonna try to uh debate it, not everybodys perfect

My baby told me, "Darling if you can't get a pardon, better get a parole"
I told her I'd be out by morning when the sun is down and with the money rolled
Ooh we, that gal's the gal for me
She loves me tenderly

I walked with my brand new slacks and my hair slick back down to Donny's pier
Donny wants me to buy him a bottle but I blew my wallet on a chandelier
All for my loving gal Eleanor who loves the elderly

A bottle of scotch
A dimesack and a diamond watch
Wouldn't you like that
A bottle of gin
A typewriter and a violin
Wouldn't you like that

Whoa! James Felice on the piano. Real talent. Alright Jimmy that's enough let's wrap it up.

Ooh we, that gal's the gal for me
She loves me tenderly

I left my blue-eyed lady and went with Tony Mercedes to the gambling room
I lost my diamond watch but in the parking lot I took back again
Oh man you've got to understand
She loves me tenderly

A bottle of scotch
A dimesack and a diamond watch
Wouldn't you like that
A bottle of gin (what)
A typewriter and a violin
Wouldn't you like that

A sunny day, a shotgun and a Chevrolet
Wouldn't you like that
A painted scene of horses on the city green
Wouldn't you like that

A microwave, a pillbox and a jack of spades
Wouldn't you like that