I saw daddy kissing santa clause
Underneath the mistletoe last night,
He didn't see me creep down the stairs to have a peak
He thought that I was tucked up in my bedroom fast asleep.

I saw daddy groping santa claus
In places that you wouldn't call pg
I guess he didn't see me spying behind the tree,
Why was santa the one on his knees?

I saw daddy spanking santa claus,
He must have been on the naughty list.
I couldn't make I noise, who knew that he liked boys?
He must have been much further in the closet than my toys.

I saw daddy kissing santa claus,
Underneath his beard so snowy white.
Oh what a laugh it would have been
If mommy had only seen daddy kissing santa claus last night!!!