I've just come back from England
With astounding, scientific sort of news
There exist in England living creatures
Much the same as me and you.

Sure, it sounds fantastic though,
But facts are facts most everywhere
That was in New York, it was in Paris, maybe the coast of Peru

No no no, no not fair, it was England
Yes it was, it was England
Yes it was, it was in her coal

How was England weather? much like ours but with a moister sort of air.
Their communication? much like ours but with a drier sort of air.
Reproduction? good question: final big surprise in there:
That's just like New York, just like Paris, just like the coast of Peru

No no no, me and her, there in England
Me and her, there in England
Me and her, there in England, oh

No no no, lots of fun, there in England
Lots of fun, there in England
Lots of fun, there in England, oh

England, oh, England...
England, oh, England...
England, oh, England...
England, oh, England...
England, oh, England...
England, oh, England...
England, oh, England...
England, oh, England...

No no no, lots of fun, there in England
Lots of fun, there in England
Lots of fun, there and you know ?

Allright, I could tell you darling
That you feel it's just some wild wild fantasy.
In a parallel existence
Where we thought we masters really ought to be

Sure, go on and doubt it, that
I dreamt it up but friend I know
That everywhere is just like England
Everywhere is just like England
And England's just like everywhere I know

No no no, Everywhere is just like England
Everywhere is just like England
And England's just like everywhere I know