I said a bad word when I was a kid
Mama said that I'd be sorry for the sin that
I did
My daddy whooped me and the preacher said shame
And I tried like hell to change

But I cuss, I smoke
I laugh at dirty jokes
The minor vices
Man, I know 'em well
I've closed down bars
I've lusted in my heart
My ex's think I oughta burn in hell
But the devil he won't notice when I die
Don't you figure he's got bigger fish to fry

Politicians taking pork barrel bribes
Crooked CEOs are getting off with no time
Christmas Eve burglars stealing good children's toys
Holiday burglars stealing
good children's toys

Yeah, there's gonna be a bonfire burning
An everlasting barbecue
But with all the bad stuff going on
There ain't gonna be room for me and you
'Cause we cuss and we smoke We laugh at Tater's jokes
The minor vices
Man, we know 'em well
We've closed down bars
We've lusted in our hearts
Our ex's think we oughta burn in hell
But the devil he won't notice when we die
Don't you figure he's got bigger fish to fry
Don't you figure he's got bigger fish to fry