Last night i told you i loved ya,
Woke up, blamed it on the vodka
I genuinely thought i was dying,
Then i could see that smile you were hiding

Last night i told you i need ya,
Thats the last time i drink tequila,
Sucking lemon and the psychic sulking
I start crying and verbally assaulting

Last night i asked you to merry me,
Thats when i remember the brandy!
I wake up and claim i didn't say it,
Screwed if i ever wake up in vegas

Wish i could stop, and i'm not joking!
Driking too much and socially smoking
Wish i could stop, start to behave and
Wake up in the morning and never miss a day again

Last night, police had to frisk me.
In the cells thanks to Bell’s fine whiskey.
I think I said too much, “Like, do you like my bracelets?
Oh wait, they’re handcuffs.”

Last night I said I want your babies.
Forget the ice, it’s not nice to drink Bailey’s. Yuuch.
I drink that much that I forget.
Whatever embarrassing thing I say next.

You said I got on one knee, and there’s no way…
Unless I’ve been drinking, oh wait, Rose!
Sailor Jerry’s Rum I think I drank me a ship full.
Please, please, someone provide me a dis’ bro.

Last night I called you a loser.
I think that was after flaming Sambuca.
I shouted at you, “Do me a favor.”
And that’s when, I fell off the pavement.

Wish I could stop and I’m not joking.
Drinking too much and socially smoking.
Wish I could stop, and start to behave and then
Wake up in the morning and never miss a day again.

Cause I’d love to learn when to shut my mouth.
Wake up in the morning and be in my own house.
Do one last shot, I’d know when to stop.
No more photos on Facebook of me doing the robot.

Know when to leave and when to lock my front door.
Stop waking up in cheese and in a bed full of people.
Sitting in a cupboard with by weird best friend.
But I’m only young so I’m not going to pretend.
I wish I…

Wish I could stop and I’m not joking.
Drinking too much and socially smoking.
I don’t really want to learn to behave.
A’men and I just missed another day again.