I heard a tree.
It was talking to me.
It said "You are an asshole."

A honeybee
Went buzzing by me.
It said "You're such an asshole."

I've experienced such strange phenomena
since I left my sweet Marie.
I left her to see the world
now the whole world is mad at me!

I caught a fish.
The fish was pissed
"I been caught by an asshole!"

A threw it back and a seagull crapped
"For you are an asshole!"

I've experienced such weird phenomena
since I left you my Marie
I walked away from your sweet sweet love
now the whole world is through with me

I've experienced such odd phenomena
since you left me my Marie
The whole world can call me what it wants
if you just come back to me
My Marie!

I need you sweet Marie
You're still an asshole

I'm on my knees, my Marie
You're still an asshole