Well, it was on this Monday morning
And the day be calm and fine
To the Harbour Grace excursion
With the boys to have a time
And just before the sailor
Took the gangway from the pier
I saw some fella haul me wife
Aboard as a volunteer

Oh me, oh my, I heard me old wife cry
Oh me, oh my, I think I'm gonna die
Oh me, oh my, I heard me old wife say
I wish I'd never taken this excursion around the bay

We had full three hundred souls aboard
Oh what a splendid sight
Dressed all in regimental
To make our spirits bright
And meself being in the double
When a funny things they'd say
They choke themselves from laughing
When they'd see us in the bay

Oh me, oh my, I heard me old wife cry
Oh me, oh my, I think I'm gonna die
Oh me, oh my, I heard me old wife say
I wish I'd never taken this excursion around the bay

My wife she got no better
She turned a sickly green
I fed her cake and candy
Fat pork and kerosene
Castor oil and sugar of candy
I rubbed pure oil on her face
And I said she'll be a dandy
When we reaches Harbour Grace

Oh me, oh my, I heard me old wife cry
Oh me, oh my, I think I'm gonna die
Oh me, oh my, I heard me old wife say
I wish I'd never taken this excursion around the bay

My wife she got no better
My wife me darling dear
The screeches from her trolley
You could hear in Carbonear
I tried every place in Harbour Grace
Tried every store and shop
To get her something for a cure
Or take her to the hop

Oh me, oh my, I heard me old wife cry
Oh me, oh my, I think I'm gonna die
Oh me, oh my, I heard me old wife say
I wish I'd never taken this excursion around the bay

She died below the brandies
As we were comin' back
We buried her in the ocean
Wrapped up in a Union Jack
So now I am a single man
In search of a pretty face
And the woman that says she'll have me
I'm off for Harbour Grace

Oh me, oh my, I heard me old wife cry
Oh me, oh my, I think I'm gonna die
Oh me, oh my, I heard me old wife say
I wish I'd never taken this excursion around the bay
Hey!