I'll fill your pillow case up with snakes
The man eating kind
Though you call yourself a woman
I doubted they would mind
Oh, my, oh
Oh, my

But there's just one problem with my plan
You spend your nights with another man
Oh, you don't rest your head with mine no more
I gotta take my plot back to the drawing board
Oh, my, oh
Oh, my
Oh, my, my

Oh, lately, I'm a heartache
I'm a desperate plan in hands
Oh, I'm a blueprint in the sand
Oh, my

You mentioned taking a holiday
And I recalled you couldn't swim
So I booked us scuba diving
Off the north coast of Belgium
Oh, my, oh
Oh, my

And I drew an image in my head
Of you sinking just like lead
But I never found you washed up on the shore
I gotta take my plot back to the drawing board
Oh, my, oh
Oh, my
Oh, my, my

Oh, lately, I'm a heartache
I'm a desperate plan in hands
Oh, I'm a blueprint in the sand
Oh, my

Oh, I'm the one that you seldom came to see
Oh, I was hidden
Oh, I've been busy working on my scheme
Oh, to teach you how to hurt

You said you needed a haircut
I recommended mister Todd
Of all the men in this big bad world
He's perfect for the job
Oh, my, oh
Oh, my
Oh, my, my

Oh, lately, I'm a heartache
I'm a desperate plan in hands
Oh, I'm a blueprint in the sand

Oh, lately, I'm a heartache
I'm a desperate plan in hands
Oh, I'm a blueprint in the sand

Oh, lately, I'm a heartache
And I haven't seen you since
So now I'm praying that you're mince
Oh, my