I pulled into the regular pump
I was feelin' quite at ease
I rolled down my window and told the man
"Fifty cents worth, please"
Then out jumped my partner
With his trusty pellet gun
He said, "Boy, this is a holdup
Keep pumpin' and don't run."

[Chorus:]
And now I wish I was somewhere other than here
Down in some honky tonk, sippin; on a beer
Yes I wish I was somewhere other than here
Cause that great fillin' station holdup
Cost me two good years.

We got fifteen dollars and a can of STP
A big ole jar of cashew nuts and a Japanese TV
Feelin' we had pulled the biggest heist of our career
We're wanted men-we'll strike again!
But first let's have a beer.

[Chorus]

We were sittin' in the Krystal
About as drunk as we could be
In walked the deputy sheriff
He was holding our TV
He roughed us, then he cuffed us
And he took us off to jail
No picture on a poster, no reward, and no bail.

[Chorus]