A foot in the street & a foo in the gutter -
that's on foot in the morning rain -
Just round the corner, a hole full of water,
and hot dog!, it's a holiday!
Splish splash in a pool of puddle,
don't trip up on a tidal wave -
you'll crash in a murky muddle…

Then you'll know how it feels
To know you're not real.

Went for a walk and I climbed up a tower -
it seemed like a thousand years
til I reached the top - oh, and I picked a flower
that grew through the stratosphere!

Drop down to a cloud or jetstream
don't trip up on a weathervane -
you'll drown in a world or wet dream…

Then you'll know how it feels
To know you're not real.

I wrote a letter and I gave it to Jenny -
I hoped for some return.
Next time I saw her she gave me a penny
wrapped up in a gummy worm -

Run round in a field or meadow -
don't trip up on a sugarcane -
Fall down in a lazy shadow…

Then you'll know how it feels
To know you're not real.